Thank You Jesus

Oh hi Marzo....
soon you will leave in some hours
So I won't let you away without a trace here.

Here's your mark!

Oh, I should use this occasion to thanking Jesus too for saving my Mom's life.
Well, He's The Savior, but last February my family and I experienced IT

Thanks You Jesus Christ!!

Just Us being Nosy On one Afternoon

One of things that sometimes I do with my old friends when we meet, and when one of us brings a lappie is to check our other friends' current lives through facebook. We're so nosy, I admit that unashamedly, and facebook feeds nosy people needs :-D..that's why I don't have my profile there :-D

Sometimes, our finding is surprising :-)
Like that afternoon, we found out one of our old friends has a current profile picture of him and a pretty woman in seemingly their wedding ceremony.
Our little quick scan through his wall then proves us that it's their wedding, a second marriage for him.
That's not the surprise, though he was just back to the singlehood in a short time, probably just a year or so.
The surprise is........the pictures of his ex-wife are still all over his albums :-D
They seem head over heels for each other in those pictures, and some comments are very intimate :-D ...well...his ex is a hottie.

Wondering what his new wife thinks of the fact.
Is it for the sake of their kids only? So they know daddy still not forget their mommy, or........the love might has gone but the lust stays? :-D
Anyhow, if that can comfort their children....and maybe the new wife has a big heart.

You're Selling a Wrong Doctrine

My today during morning to the afternoon was tinted by greyish colour.  Stories resulted from my own experience and from news that I overheard on the radio and later when I watched one of our national local tellies, Metro, were the ones who painted that colour. Since throwing all the stories here would make my entry too long, I decide to write the non personal one first.

I watched a dialogue on Metro TV, a talking about terrorism that currently begins its stupidity in some parts of Indonesia. There were two participants who argued each other, and a moderator.
I dare not to write much here,because it has the possibility to ignite the short fuse of some narrow minded people, and also because unfortunately I didn't watch fully from the beginning.
I side with Al Chaidar, the observer of terrorism, because of strong points of his argumentation.
However the one that caught my attention is what the other person said.

He said that it is wrong to kill people who don't sin.
Yes, people who don't sin, and I'm sure he meant it that way because he kept repeating those words.
He didn't mean innocent people.

That makes me think.
Humph...he's not a law maker..so..is he God?
Afaik, imho, only God who knows everything. Besides, is there any of us who doesn't have sin?
Not even a pope, not the late mother Theresa, not any of the preachers I saw at Church, not one of us.
I bet each of us was/ is not resistant to sin.
I can't include Jesus, because He's 100% human but 100% God.

The statement  "it's wrong to kill people who don't sin", really makes me frown...

How could he or the people who sympathise him or have the same thought with him decide, which one who doesn't have sin and which one who does? Which ones are allowed to be killed and which ones are not?

Wrong doctrine, so totally absurd. Hope he realises that, otherwise his brains need more nourishment.

Ok. that's one colour of grey for today. Let me end this entry with some translated lines from Takuboku Ishikawa - taken from Romaji Diary and Sad Toys (Tuttle Classics)

A Spoonful of Cocoa

I know
The sad heart of the terrorist-
A single-minded heart
Which finds it impossible to cut asunder speech and act,
A heart that wants to speak with deeds
Instead of words, which one has been deprived of,
A heart that hurls at the foe the body encasing it-
This is the sorrow serious and fervent men forever have.
Sipping cold cocoa from a spoon
After some eternal endless debate,
I know from this slightly bitter taste
The sad sad heart
Of the terrorist.

You sad pathetic creature! I mean all terrorists!

Random Quote of Saturday: Friend

Just something freshening as I walk the internet today. A bit lighten up the withering flame of affinity inside myself...it gives me hope...

6 months ago i didn't know Amy.

5 months ago, i wanted to be Amy's friend.

4 months ago, Amy and i became best friends.

3 months ago, Amy stayed up to keep me from killing myself.

Ever since, Amy has been the reason I've kept going. Friends who care, no matter how long you have known them

Finally another update within less than a week, made me a proud blogger :-D

Wishes to come true

Our cake for 2010

Cause Love is the greatest,

Health is precious

Joy is priceless

Grenoble cake

by Maqui's

the best cake in Jakarta!!!

Just a Light Early January Chit Chat

Happy that I attended Church on the first day in January 2010. That will not automatically 'save' me, but as a believer, it recharges my faith, somehow.
I haven't had many things worth noticing at this very young 2010, most stuffs are still just the leftovers from 2009.

Talking about the leftover things, I forgot to write it down on my blog my favourite films throughout 2009. So here they are, the top three, starts from the most liked by me:

1. The Ugly Truth
I had started laughing at the beginning of this film. Very funny, and Gerard Butler is the sexiest man alive!I'm probably a bit biased, but the dance scene really possessed me and I even dreamed about it, but not with GB :-P This is a very light movie, you don't need to think at all cause there will be no time to think, you will not be able to restrain yourself to laugh.

2. This Is It
it changed my perception of the late Michael Jackson. He was indeed very passionate about the things that he loved, but I didn't know that he was that shy, and he was very humble too. I somehow believe that he was misunderstood by some people, but people who dislike him I'm sure also admit it that MJ was and is a great dancer and a genius in music and entertainment world. Glad that the producer of his last concert filmed the rehearsal sessions.

3. Avatar
A must see in 3D. Very cute story with great and cutting edge visual effects.

I must stop now, sleepy already, and oh, my best friend Leet will undergo a surgery tomorrow, please wish her a best luck and pray for her too.

Happy 2010 friends, may God gives us more power, more success and best luck. xoxo.

Don't Want To Be Prita-lised But I Need To Complain

I'm questioning the professionalism of Quack-quack International Hospital in Jakarta. Mind you, the actual name is not Quack-quack, but it's indeed an International Hospital. I don't put its real name here because I don't want to be PRITA-LIZED by the so-called justice. The other hospital with whom Prita has a clash is also an International Hospital. I guess being labeled with International doesn't mean that the hospital is as competent as its foreign associate. The label seems just like a gimmick to suck patients' money, but I hope I'm mistaken.

I r-e-a-l-l-y hate that Quack-quack International Hospital. Hate is not a Christian word at all, but the heck with it, I'm at rage.
I'm gonna start with the background story why I feel that way.
I went to Quack-quack International Hospital  two years ago with a big hope to find solution to my problem, which is not something that threatens my life (I hope not) nor will infect other human. I chose that hospital, not because it's a good hospital, but because the doctor that I wanted to meet is the famous one for my case and he's part of that hospital.
Day 1, when I went there, everything was ok. The doctor -let's call the creature as Dr. Joker (as in Batman)-was friendly and full of smile. He told me to undergo some screening since he didn't notice my problem. He told me, I could come back tomorrow so he could see the result of the screening. Although on that next day his schedule was actually packed with number of surgeries, he didn't mind to meet me before or after the first surgery. I then went to the registration desk to register for the next day early appointment around 08.00 (I think), and though the person in charge said that Dr. Joker tomorrow doesn't have practice schedule, I explained that Dr. Joker himself had given me time to meet in spite of his peak schedule for surgeries. So it's confirmed.
Day two. I went back there the following day and straight to the administration desk to confirm my presence and do administration stuffs. The person in charge told me to go to Dr. Joker waiting room and to also inform the stuffs at registration desk there that I'm already presence.
I did all everything they told, yet I had to wait......7 hours!!#@$$("!@X!!! plus few complaints from myself to the stuffs until finally met the super busy Dr. Joker, who probably was not informed by his stupid stuffs -those hospital stuffs that I dealt with- at of my arrival.
Oh, the funniest and the stupidest thing is, around the 6th hour of my waiting, my mobile was beeping and the text was very queer, saying "Just a notification that you have appointment with Dr. Joker today, please confirm. From Quack-quack International Hospital".  Am I dreaming? Am I hallucinating? I couldn't understand the message. I had been waiting there for hours and then came an sms from that hospital asking me to confirm my appointment. I was really disoriented, lost in time and space.


Anyway, after that long and lone wait at the waiting room, the nurse told me to move to the Recovery Room, where I saw 2 patients who just got operated and their family. I thought Dr. joker was to meet me later in his room, I guess I was totally wrong. A nice nurse (the only nice and sane one!!) asked another nurse to call Dr. Joker because she's afraid that Dr. Joker might have forgotten since he had meeting in waiting before another surgery. The doctor met me after I was at the Recovery Room for 10 minutes. He open my screening result in front of all the people at Recovery Room, and quickly judged it and approved what I told him the day before. That's it. He didn't even care to open the envelope of the letter addressed to him from the lab! It's indeed expensive, but money was not the matter if I got what I deserved.
When I asked him, so what can be done? He just said "well, just blah blah blah" (sorry for the censor, not that he talked dirty but it's just that I don't like my problem being publicised).
I told him "no way, jose" (not exactly like that). Then he easily replied "Or else, I don't mind to operate you" and he smile widely, as if it's not a problem at all. That conversation only lasted less than 8 minutes and with no privacy at all!! I had to wait almost 7 hours for that! I felt so silly. I had decided to wait because I didn't want to waste time on street, since Quack-quack International Hospital is quite remote from the city center, not to mention the lousy traffic jams.
Enuf for the background story.

Now, what makes me in a mad flare....
I received a letter from a 'Pro Blahness Society', an organisation of people having the same problem as mine, it invites me to join its event, a meeting. Pro Blahness Society has invited Dr. Joker as their speaker.

That means Quack-quack International Hospital has shared its patients' and ex-patients' private data without foretelling the related patients!! Horrible practice!
I have emailed the hospital to erase all my data from its databank and that I am very upset to know that my rights as patient have been tyrannised..in Indonesian language..di zolimin!
Probably Quack-quack International Hospital doesn't care at all about patients' right? It is my right as a patient (or in this case ex-patient of that hospital) to keep my record as private and confidential!

But the kind of Quack-quack International Hospital and Dr. Joker, will always be safe because of the so-called 'justice' in Indonesia, because if I reported them, I would probably become the candidate of another Prita Mulyasari who got jailed because she innocently and harmlessly complained.

I wish I were a powerful dictator, I would send those corrupted people to Guantanamo :-)

God, help them to understand, patients are not articles of commerce!

Too Religious to Talk

Had a bit fun debate with my dear chat friend, let's call him Elvis (lol). It started with the thing that Elvis told me long ago that he doesn't mind to kiss a transvestite, only if hshe -the transvestite- looks really feminine.
It's not a case even if it's right, he's still my friend, but I was kinda curious last time when we chat again and eventually landed in the same topic. This time I for amusement matter told Elvis that he must be a bi then if he doesn't mind kissing another male passionately :-D.
He must have been stung by that, cause his reaction was a bit bizarre :-D
He didn't admit that he doesn't mind, but he just went on and on saying that if he likes (the hshe) than he will kiss, and I just wanted him to answer yes or no to my conclusion that he's a bi.
He then went on to the idea that kissing a transvestite is something similar to eating pork (for Jewish, Muslim, and the vegetarian), specifically he said this:

28/10/2009 22:02:35 Elvis: i don't understand
28/10/2009 22:02:43 Elvis: if i don't like to eat pork
28/10/2009 22:02:57 Elvis: but someday i'd eat pork without knowing it
28/10/2009 22:03:05 Elvis: and i love it
28/10/2009 22:03:19 Elvis: why i should say "i didn't like it" just because it was pork?
28/10/2009 22:03:51 Me: no its very different
28/10/2009 22:04:03 Me: see, first we're talking about a she male
28/10/2009 22:04:29 Me: that makes you understood well that, the person is partly male :P
28/10/2009 22:04:35 Me: it's not like pork

then, he finally dropped the bomb...

28/10/2009 22:05:01 Elvis: well if someday it will happen
28/10/2009 22:05:19 Elvis: i'll not say "i don't like it" just for some religious prejudices
28/10/2009 22:05:41 Me: no, of course not, we're not talking about religious thing at all
28/10/2009 22:05:47 Elvis: no?
28/10/2009 22:06:02 Elvis: if you aren't talking about religion
28/10/2009 22:06:13 Elvis: there's no discussion about being bi straight and so on
28/10/2009 22:18:05 Me: for me, even if I were agnostic or atheist, gay and bi are still abnormal
28/10/2009 22:18:35 Elvis: luckily just for you :)

The chat didn't stop there, but his opinion is like unshakable mountain, that only the religious people have objection toward homosexuality, and to question such thing means the person must be a religious one and there's no point to discuss it at all. Lol. Checkmate.
He must have mix atheism with homosexuality :-D

Un biglietto per mia mamma

I made this card as a requirement for Fika's "MINI JUICY CONTEST". The contest theme is about making a card or a scrapbook for someone very special and with some bit story why the person is special.
By default parents are normally always special someones to their children, my Dad is also a special someone for me, but my Mom needs some encouragement because she really had some troubling moments since October last year that made her have to be in and out some hospitals, and from January til early May she almost spent the whole months lay in the hospital bed.

Glad that she made it through, but during that period of time I came to realise how much I missed her and how much it stressed me to see her in that painful situation. Painful as literally being cut without anaesthetic, this was because Mom is very sensitive to anaesthetic agent. Previously in January, she almost lost her life after her bad-toe amputation operation, the operation went well, but after she was back in her room for just about 30 minutes, she started to pant and gasp like she could no longer have power to inhale. She even told us that she couldn't make it anymore, there was only me, my auntie -my Mom's elder sister and my uncle-my Mom's younger brother in the room, all the other have gone home. My auntie and uncle then tried to calm her  and to keep her conscious while I nervously ran for help since the bell wouldn't get the nurses' attention as fast as we want and because the nurse station was just in front of my Mom's room. So in that one day she came out from the operation and landed at the ICU. It was because of that later when she needed another surgery for her sole of foot in March, the doctor that operated her seemed reluctant to do it, it seemed that Mom would be in big risk for that 'small' operation because of Mom's susceptibility to anaesthetic. The chief doctor of the team who's also my Mom's Internist Endocrinologist then took over the operation procedure by himself but without anaesthetic. I don't want to tell the horror here cause it's not nice at all, but just imagine the pain  every time some muscles being cut.

I'm just happy Jesus gave Mom strength  and power during that time, and that her healing process goes so well. I thank also to my friends who prayed for her health, especially to Michele who lit a candle at Church for her cure. I'm happy with this contest too.

The Bomb and Mr President Speech

Angry, sick and sad, are what I feel about the bombing that hit two hotels in my city. After enjoying peaceful atmosphere for 5 years since the bomb attack targeting Australia Embassy in Jakarta, now we the people of Jakarta must see the similar cruelty again.
The two bombings killed 9 people and injured more than 60 people.

I also can't believe that JW Marriot Hotel got hit again, the security was tight enough there since the bomb attack in 2003. Ritz Carlton which is in the same neighbourhood seemed to have a matched security system too. In fact, many public and private buildings in Jakarta have included walkthrough metal detector or at least hand metal detector and CCTV as part of their security systems. We have been accustomed to those two and maybe got a little annoyed too cause every time we enter a building we must hand out our bags to be scrutinised and go through the detector or have our bags detected by the hand metal detector. Every cars must pass some security procedure before entering the gate of public buildings. It's more than enough, I think. Have the securities in charge also got tired already with all the routine and become unwary? Or have the culprits deceit skills have more developed?

I doubt that the security was loosening up, especially since FC Manchester United was scheduled to stay in Ritz Carlton Hotel and our national Football team would stay in JW Marriot. The two teams were preparing a friendly match to greet MU fans in Indonesia. Seems it's cancelled now if not postponed.

No news yet about who's behind the bombs, but in his public speech responding to the bombings, Mr. President kinda related the incidents with his winning the election? He showed photos of his picture as the target of shooting practice by some extremists (?). He got the photos from the Indonesia State Intelligence Agency. You can see part of his speech at the end of this post.
It's in Indonesian language, but you can see the picture of him as a shooting target.

Anyway I hope the violence and revolution that Mr. President said will emerges against his winning, will never happen.
I hope those who are responsible for the bombings can be discovered and arrested as soon as possible. My deepest sympathy goes to all the victims and their family, may God give you all strength. Peace be with those who died.
And my beautiful country, we will stand strong and fight back.

UPDATE!!
The full speech English text of President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono (SBY) on the Jakarta Bombings is HERE.
The reaction from his rivals -Vice President Jusuf Kalla and Megawati- that counsel Mr President not to politicize the terror attacks is HERE.

We Are The World Meme

Ok I have something to post today thanks to Monica. Seems that the world is still mourning because of the shocking dead of Michael Jackson, and to me the feeling came in slowly. I didn't really feel anything on day one or two, but since yesterday I've felt the lost, and guess what song that has been lingering on my head? Not We Are the World, but..

..this...

..One day in your life...
--//---
you remember me somehow..though you don't need me now
..I will stay in your heart...
and when things fall apart...you remember one day...

He certainly stays in many people's hearts already.
Well, better stop now before I'm getting emotional, better get back to the We Are the World Meme from Monica.



*Start Copy Here*
You do not have to be tagged to play along. The game is simple and so are the rules.
1. Copy from *Start Copy Here* through *End Copy Here*
2. Add your site(s) to the list. Just be sure to post at each site you add.
3. Tag as many bloggers as you like so the list keeps on growing.
4. Let me know your blog’s name and url by leaving me a comment HERE. I will add you to the master list.
5. Come back and copy the master list back to your site, often. This process will allow late-comers to get as much link benefit as the first ones in.

We Are The World Bloggers Master List:

1. Emila Yusof 2. The Other Side of Emila 3. Mariuca 4. Mariuca’s Perfume Gallery 5. Meow Diaries 11. Unlisted One 7. Spiff, the Spaceman 8. My Sweet Escape 9. Nota Nurul 10. Life’s Tapestry 11. Spontaneous Insignificancy 12. LadyJava 13. Miss Igorota 14. AnnyBoo 15. Yoon See 16. Jia’s Life 17. Nessa’s Mumblings 18. Also Mommy 19. The Walk of Life 20.Pretty Firefly 21. Untouchable EARTH 22. Baterya 23. Comedy Plus 24. Bain Cardin 25. Strawberry Milkshake 26. Turn-U-Off 27. Jom Heboh Di Sini 28. Notes by Marvic 29. Memoir Mez 30.Origena 31. You’re next

*End Copy Here*

For Sammy who deserves lots of love

Today when I visit blogcatalog, one of the thread tells me to visit a link about Sammy's story. Maybe because I have a very weak heart for dogs, I couldn't continue to watch the following video yet. It's too sad, made my head hurts.

It would be wasting time to question how could someone do bad things to such a loving creature while in fact there have been many stories about dogs' valours in helping humanity.

So this case is just one example of terrible cruelty. Very sad.
Nevertheless, dog's survival ability and its life spirit are amazing.
Sammy is really an inspiration.
I hope Sammy will now always get all love that he deserves.
He will never be able to see again, but he sure can live much better with much love.

Please help spreading this video of Sammy.



See how Sammy looks now in the care of Noah's Ark Rescue, and he still needs some help.

Seeking Comfort

At last...my first entry for this 2009 :), sorry to all EC dropper who visited this blog, and to bloggers who left messages that I hadn't had time to visit back. I didn't have mood to write before because since 26 Dec last year, there has been stressful moment in my family that is due to my Mom's health problem.

Anyhow, today she's going to have small surgery. It's a small one, but yet since my Mom has a bit problem with her current weak heart, we're all still in a state of worry. So, anyone, friends or strangers who read this please kindly pray for my Mom's wellness ok :))

Some say that when in time of trouble some people tend to be more religious, meaning, their dosage of pray is more than usual :-P and it seems I'm one of them.

I can't write much, because I have to go to hospital soon. The surgery will take place today around 1 pm. I searched the internet before for some songs that I usually sing at Church, and here's one of my favourite:

Almighty God my redeemer
My hiding place my safe refuge, no other name like Jesus
No power can stand against You.

My feet are planted on this rock
And I will not be shaken
My hope it comes from You alone
My Lord and my salvation

Your praise is always on my lips
Your word is living in my heart
And I will praise You with a new song, My soul will bless You Lord

You fill my life with greater joy
Yes I delight myself in You
And I will praise You with a new song, My soul will bless You, Lord

When I am weak, you make me strong
When I'm poor, I know I'm rich for in the power of Your name
All things are possible
All things are possible
All things are possible
All things are possible

Gossiping Our Gigolo Friends

Photo by 1v0

What a title :))
Well, a week ago I met a long time friend after having not seen each other for quite a long time. We met because Ira invited me and our other friend, Fedi, to watch a movie for free at JIFFEST. I probably will write the review of that movie on my next post.

This time I'm writing about the thing that came up after we spoke about our friends from the past. One of the news that I heard reminded me on what I heard when I met Noe -a friend from my senior highschool. Fedi told a surprising similar story, of course about a different person. However when I think over about those two persons who become the subjects of the stories, I found similarities between them.

So what kind of surprising news would you hear when you meet your old friends?
Me, for the second times I heard news about friend who has (I think the other one has stop) other profession as a.. ahem..gigolo!

Like most gossip, of course this is not something that matters to us, but still it's a guilty pleasure thing that brought us a lot of laugh during our gathering.

None of us was questioning our gigolo friend's morality when Fedi disclosed the news. Ira and I instead disbelieved that news, because in our eyes or maybe in our thought we remembered him as being an effeminate boy. We still can remember the way his speaking which was quite cissy, so I asked Fedi something like "are you sure he escorts women?."
Fedi said he once even ever revealed to her that he usually met the women in fitness centre and that he enjoyed the company of senior women.
Then Ira suddenly made gesture with hands on her neck and said "yeah I remember he has a disproportional big neck after he joined fitness."
We all laughed being reminded of that, but it's very true and that big neck thing had been circulated when we're still at the university, it's not because he was a popular guy, but maybe because of the sudden transformation of him becoming bulking up with muscle, especially bulking neck :))
We think he's too bunglesome to be a gigolo :-D -not that we've met one in person.

As I already mentioned, it's not the first time I heard about a friend become gigolo. About four years ago when I met Noe, I also disbelieved what he said about our friend who became a gigolo, but he said it's already known by many friends. I've known that friend since I was in the junior highschool. In those junior highschool time he only mingled with one boy and both of them were shunned by most of other friends. He was short, a bit sissy, and was sometimes dejected by other friends. But he changed a lot at the senior highschool, I knew it because we went to the same school again. He grew up fast, became quite tall with an athletic built body. He had a bigger circle of friends this time, but from what I could render from Noe's story, he wasn't really liked by many. He was always nice to me though, so I never had any problem with him.

The similarity between those friends is that they both once were reputed as sissy boys.
Other similarities are they both academically smart persons and come from well-off families.
Not long after I heard that thing from Noe, I learned another surprising thing about that allegedly gigolo friend. I read about him on a big local newspaper, not about him being gigolo of course, but the news was talking about the marriage of a daughter of one prominent person, and the groom was him. Pretty happy 'ending' life for him :)), but still not sure about the other gigolo friend.

Sunday Morning Survivor

Photo by cuellar
We were quite lucky that our house is near a hospital, and at that time when the incident happened the road was already quiet, making us possible to reach hospital in less than ten minutes.

There were about 3 patients already at the ER (Emergency Room), luckily I didn't have to see any bloods splash. Amongst them, Mom was the critical one. No longer than 10 minutes we were there, then a car stop in front of the ER, one family consisted of many people came in carrying an old man who also had trouble in breathing.

The vibe was really tense by then, the sound that came out from the supporting machine that my Mom used, then that old man's voice and also with his supporting machine. I heard one of the paramedics who took care of the old man called for another assistance, but the young doctor who was trying to revive my Mom said that my Mom was the more critical one. She had put something look like powder on my Mom's tongue, then she mumbled "This is not working....this is not working...this is not working.." I was stunned, was not hopeless I just starred at that young doctor, and I think she starred back at me as but I couldn't really grasp her expression, she just kept saying "this is not working."

A seems more experienced doctor joined the drama, she asked a certain procedure, and the young doctor said that she has done that but still "it's not working"....damn...that words again. I couldn't restrain myself anymore, I told the young doctor, gave my Mom an injection that can revive her. I really didn't know what I was talking, and I successfully made that young doctor more confused :-D. Then the more experienced doctor shout to my Mom "Ma'am..wake up..look at me," my Mom opened her eyes and her eyeballs responded to where the voice was coming from. I started to pat my Mom's sole of foot to stimulate her to keep awaking and kept telling her to remember Jesus. I started to pray ceaselessly, counting everything on Jesus' power.

By that time we had been there for 20 minutes, the old man that came in later gained his consciousness first and he was then taken to the CCU (Critical Care Unit) room. I was sad that my Mom still couldn't leave ER. As the paramedics with the old man on his bed were passing where I stand, I unintentionally looked at his sole of feet. They were very pale, almost white!! I automatically shifted my eyes to my Mom's sole of feet, hers were still rosy. I think my mind was a bit wondering about the shocking pale that I had just seen, but I didn't want to think anything bad at all.

Now the only patient left at the ER was my Mom and it took almost fifteen minutes later that my Mum was finally taken to CCU room. There were a lot of people at the CCU lounge where the families of CCU patients were waiting, including the family of that old man. We decided that my brother and I were the ones who stayed there, while my Dad and other brother went home. The time had already hit somewhere around 3 am, a big group of people of the watchers had also left. Ten minutes later, a paramedic came out from the CCU room looking for the family of one of the patients. It was that old man's. The two remaining persons of that old man went to the CCU, then one of them came back to the CCU lounge straight to the public telephone. I heard him saying "tell everyone to come back to the hospital. Don't have to tell anything else, just come back here immediately."

I tried to stop the bad thought, but I knew something bad is happening. Almost fifteen minutes later that family started back to fill the lounge. Then from the elevator back door came out two people rolling a big long box on a cart, didn't really look like a casket but I had that thought. When my brother told me that it's for a dead person, I told him "no, I think it's for carrying some food."
The big long box on the cart came out from the CCU along with that old man's family, and the one who made a call walked beside the box and kept caressing it, they went into the elevator. The CCU lounge became spacious again.

My brother and I were at the hospital until midday of Sunday, then my other sibling and my Dad came to change us. On Tuesday Mom left the CCU. My siblings and I by turn is sleeping at Mom's room to watch over her at the hospital. Doctor said that it looks like this week Mom can go back home. Thanks Jesus for letting my Mom survives, I just hope she will never again recklessly forsake her diabetic medicine for traditional medicinal herbs.

Father, You knew it!

Photo by Jesus Presley
Last Saturday was another frightening moment for me and family. Just like last January, Mom was rushed into the hospital Emergency Room because she almost couldn't breath, later the doctor found out that it happened because my Mom blood sugar level hit 500. It caused her lungs to work improperly and submerged by water, causing them to swollen and press her heart. In her case, that's how the heart attack was invented.

To be honest now I think I'm an egoistic person, cause I prayed to Jesus to safe my Mom cause I still need her. Doesn't that sound egocentric? Well, I couldn't think clearly what to say at that time, I prayed on and on begging Holy Spirit to strengthen my Mom's body, soul and brains. Then I remembered, what if she gained back her strength but her health still poor? Isn't it the same with giving her a torturing situation?
Thanks wholeheartedly to my Father in Heaven that even though I prayed chaotically, He still interpreted my prayer well, and Mom survives.

I will tell my experience in the E.R. on my next blog entry, right now, I'm very sleepy and I have some EC ads to be approved. Oh, and today is also a special day.

They see Not what we see

Photo by Pulpolux !!!
I can't help myself talking about death penalty now. I'm not sad nor am I happy with the deaths of those 3 infamous bombers, but I'm dissatisfied seeing that the event in question seems don't send the right message to some people.

Shouldn't death penalty bring message to all spectators that death is the punishment for similar misconduct doers? So anyone would never even think to copycat them.

Somehow I feel that death penalty is like a way to comfort some of us the living, and that doesn't even contribute something to the dead victims, because we know even though those killers died 100 times that still can't bring back the victims to life. It doesn't make thing better either, because it afflicts some people.

In regard to what happened to those three people, I become numb because I got so disgusted seeing them showing their superbia upon the death of more than 200 people.

I would agree with capital punishment only if it can educate people of what is right and what is wrong thus to make people to stay away from killing or hurting others.

That is not what I saw when I watched the report on television following the mourning day of those bombers. Their partisans showed no remorse but they looked so adamant in their belief, -note, belief here is not meant to be religion, but it is meant as their own interpretation of their religion.

The elder brother of two bombers even declared this in front of the mourners:
"The souls of younger brothers are now being carried by green birds"

It seems their deaths have made them martyrs. The capital punishment message doesn't infiltrate those people. They have their own mindset, and if nothing can change that mindset then.....

While putting them in jail forever for a developing country like my country, would take loads of resources, effort..et cetera.

Is there a better way then? A way that can bring justice and peace?

Everything is Ecstasy

Before some hours ago, I'd never known Jack Kerouac.
I found him through one of my linkages on the net, and the cupid works through his words.
You're going to be my favourite too now!!
This writing....it was love at the first read for me!
So I'm putting it here, I put it anywhere, it's becoming my mantras now... :))

"I have lots of things to teach you now, in case we ever meet,
concerning the message that was transmitted to me under a pine tree in North Carolina on a cold winter moonlit night. It said that Nothing Ever Happened, so don't worry. It's all like a dream.
Everything is ecstasy, inside. We just don't know it because of our thinking-minds.
But in our true blissful essence of mind is known that everything is alright forever and forever and forever.
Close your eyes, let your hands and nerve-ends drop, stop breathing for 3 seconds, listen to the silence inside the illusion of the world, and you will remember the lesson you forgot, which was taught in immense milky way soft cloud innumerable worlds long ago and not even at all.
It is all one vast awakened thing. I call it the golden eternity.
It is perfect. We were never really born, we will never really die. It has nothing to do with the imaginary idea of a personal self, other selves, many selves everywhere: Self is only an idea, a mortal idea. That which passes into everything is one thing.
It's a dream already ended.
There's nothing to be afraid of and nothing to be glad about.
I know this from staring at mountains months on end.
They never show any expression, they are like empty space.
Do you think the emptiness of space will ever crumble away?
Mountains will crumble, but the emptiness of space, which is the one universal essence of mind, the vast awakenerhood, empty and awake, will never crumble away because it was never born."

When you Choose Hope, anything is Possible

Photo by Steve Beger Photography (Beger.com Productions)
I've been a regular visitor of Monica's blog these days and three days ago I was visiting her blog and saw her entry about Breast Cancer Awareness Month that takes time this October. While reading the entry, I had made commitment that I would do the entry too, but hey, I was surprised to see that my blog is mentioned there. She's tagging me in, and this will be my first experience to the tag posting game ever...I'm a tag virgin :))


Sadly this month also the month that my family and I found out that my big cousin has been confirmed to have breast tumor of stage 4 :(. She's just started to undergo chemotherapy sessions some days ago.

I haven't heard the rest of the story yet, but from her Mom my Mom found out that she actually had sensed a lump on one of her breasts, but I am not sure either she's too afraid to admit that there's something wrong, or she'd forgotten it because she is indeed a busy career woman and she is also a housewife. I think, it was the beginning of this month that she found out the lump has become bigger than ever when she did manual check by herself. Unfortunatelly when she finally decided to do mammogram -I'm not saying it's too late, but sadly it's already on that stage 4.

I do believe -I am hoping and praying, though I'm scared-, there's still a chance for her to be cured. There's always God and miracles, and whatever happens God knows the best. Right?

Anyhow, I have checked out NBCAM site and found out it has Recipe Corner, that I think it will be good for her, since I know she probably will lose appetite because of the chemo sessions and the distress.

Now, if you want to participate this month awareness of Breast Cancer, just follow this rules and make entry before October ends:

***start copy***

1. Put the logo in your blog.
2. Add a link to the person who shared it with you.
3. Nominate at least 7 other blogs
4. Add your link to the list of participants below
5. Leave a message for your nominee on their blog.

PINK Sisterhood
1- Monica 2- Ori 3- Leet-gallery 4.- Lilly's Life 5.- Artconstellation 6.- Redpinemountain- 7. -YOU Next!!

***end copy***

Sorry to break the rule for tagging less than 7, cause the deadline is very tight :)) -I know, you have tagged me since some days ago Monica, sorry for this late entry!!- I will understand if my nominees can't fulfill it, and I hope you all don't mind I link your blogs here.
I'm tagging these unique blogs Leet-gallery: my friend's arts, Lilly's Life: for good laugh, Artconstellation : wonderful narrative sketches, Redpinemountain : worthy motivational words. Visit them, trust my taste :) .

Note:
- The title is taken from one of testimonials on http://www.nationalbreastcancer.org
- Read more here http://www.nationalbreastcancer.org
- National Breast Cancer Awareness Month http://nbcam.org

Blog Action Day: Can We End Poverty?

Photo by Wetsun
As a citizen of a developing country, poverty to me is like everyday news.
Poverty in my country might not be as extreme as that in many parts of Africa, but still it's sorrowful. Sorrowful in the sense that there are actually a lot of things can be done to help the poor, but only small things are done -especially by the government.

Poverty seems not yet become a prominent issue, at least that's what I feel.
As a country which is now zealously developing, we are in euphoria to see the physical developments in our big cities, which unfortunately are savoured by the middle to upper society only.
The developments many times squeeze some unfortunate people, and make them poor.

Yes, we can easily create poverty but it will take great effort to overpower it.
Last Sunday at the Church, the preacher said something like the poor will always exist as long as we can't grow in empathy.

Thank you BlogActionDay for making the World more aware about poverty.
Let's all hope that we can overcome poverty.

Photo by Lord Jim